How To Keep A Divorce Out Of Court

Nobody wants to think about their marriage ending, but sometimes a divorce is the best option for everyone. No matter how hard you try to save your marriage, this isn’t always possible. If this is the case, you can help things to go more smoothly, try to keep things civil with your partner and settle things as cleanly as you can. This is especially important if you have children. If you can, protect your family by settling a divorce as amicably as you can and keep your divorce away from the courts. 

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1. Use a good family law solicitor, like the law office of David Pedrazas, PLLC. A good lawyer can give you advice on the best way for you and your partner to keep things civil. The right lawyer will do everything they can to keep you out of court, and able to settle your divorce without any nastiness. 
2. Try meditation. With mediation, you will both meet with a trained mediator, who will allow you to talk through any differences of opinion and disagreements around the separation and help you to resolve them. The mediator can help you come to an agreement that is fair and will satisfy both of you. After this agreement has been reached, you can then have it drawn up in legal documents by your family lawyer. Agreeing on a course of action like this saves you from fighting for a settlement in court. 
3. Try collaborative divorce. To do this, you will both have to sign up for a non-confrontational approach. This can, of course, be a challenge when emotions are running high and you’re feeling hurt and upset, but if you can manage it, it will help to come to an amicable arrangement. You will both engage your own lawyers who will work together, through a series of meetings, with both of you and your solicitors. With this approach, you’ll reach an agreement together. 
4. Put your children first. If you have children together, a divorce court will always put their needs first during any divorce proceedings. If you’re trying to stay out of court, have the same priority and try to decide what is best for your children. Put first whatever is least stressful and upsetting for your children. Try to set aside any of your own hurt feelings or anger towards your ex-spouse, and instead concentrate on coming to an agreement that will be the least rough on your kids. 
5. Try and forget the small details. It’s natural to feel angry and upset when going through a divorce, it can be all too easy to accidentally get caught up on fighting over all the small details just to win. If you do find yourself fighting over things that don’t really matter, like the specific day you will be able to see the children, try and refocus on what really matters. Keep things as amicable as you can so you can make logical, fair arrangements. If you don’t do this, it’s much easier to get stuck in a courtroom spending a lot of money on expensive divorce lawyers arguing over who gets to keep your DVD collection. 
6. Be realistic. Divorce negotiations may start at a 50/50 split, but even in the most amicable divorce, it is unlikely that this is how things will actually end up. Your lawyer will be able to advise you on what you can realistically expect from a settlement. What you get will be based on factors like custody arrangements and the income of you and your spouse. The fairest deal may not actually be splitting things down the middle, so don’t push for it if your lawyer doesn’t think it’s likely you’ll get it. Instead, listen to your lawyer and accept what is fair. 
7. Be prepared to compromise. You’re never going to get everything you want, and if you want to keep your divorce away from a courtroom, you need to be able to compromise. It’s not worth being stubborn about everything and refusing to back down. Save your fight for the things that are really important to you, like the custody arrangement. Try not to argue over smaller things, to keep things progressing as smoothly as you can. 

If you can keep your divorce from becoming nasty, it’s much more likely that you’ll be able to stay on civil terms, which is essential if you share children. Be realistic, remember why you’re doing this and save yourself the cost, stress, and upset of a court battle.